Wedding Stories

It’s been a while
since I’ve posted something to this blog.
That’s for a lot reasons,
which I won't detail here.
But that surely doesn’t mean
that my mind has been running on empty!


Just this weekend
I was a part of the music ministry
for the marriage convalidations
at St. Gabriel.
These masses always make me reflect.
Somehow,
these couples,
these families,
seem to have really reflected
on what the sacrament means.
And you know,
that makes what I do
feel so special.


Over the years
I have encountered all sorts
of requests from people
for their (or their son’s or daughter’s) wedding,
requests that show that these particular folk
really didn’t have a clue
about the Sacrament,
about the Holiness that is Marriage.
And some,
it would seem,
really didn’t have a clue
about the Eucharist.


There was the bride
who asked if they could have a mass,
even though her spouse to be
wasn’t Catholic
and wasn’t converting anytime soon.
She asked if he could be given
a breath mint at the time communion
to make him feel like he was participating.
I wonder,
what did Eucharist mean
to this young bride?


There was the bride
who came extra early for her mass.
Her decor included silk roses.
She sprayed them all with rose smelling perfume
before her guests arrived.
Was this the detail she most worried about
on her wedding day?
If she really wanted this done,
could she not have asked a friend to do this
so she could focus on more important things????
I wonder what goes through people’s minds sometimes. . ..


There was the bride
who wanted the “Cinderella” mass.
She wanted her man
to try the glass slipper
on all of the bridesmaids
and, of course,
it wouldn’t fit
until The Bride came down the aisle.
When the pastor said
that this wouldn’t not be done,
she still insisted that the groom
wear his cape,
which was covered in peacock feathers.
I wonder,
what did people remember about this mass?
Did they remember the exchange of vows?
Did they remember the exchange of rings?
Or did they remember the feathers?


And then there was the bride
who couldn’t understand
why her dog
couldn’t be the flower girl.
I said a prayer for her as I wrote this paragraph.
She’s probably still mad at me.


And the couple
who wanted to do a butterfly release.
It stormed that day
with the lights flickering on and off.
At the end of the mass
no one went directly outside
as it was pouring rain.
They all just stood in the vestibule. . .
. . .and released the butterflies anyway.
And what do people remember about this ceremony?
Deceased butterflies???


There was the bride
who wore combat boots.
Neither she nor her spouse to be
were military.
Neither were their parents or siblings.
She just liked the way the combat boots
looked with her bridal gown.
I’m certain everyone in attendance
will remember this.
She lifted her dress slightly
as she walked down the aisle
to show her boots. . .
. . but does anyone remember
the vows?????


And then there was the mother of the groom
who hired me for the music.
I later found out that the mother of the bride
had hired Mariachi.
Neither the bride nor the groom
were aware of any of this.
Good thing I ALWAYS
check in with the bridal couple
when someone else inquires about music.


Thankfully,
most of the weddings in recent years
haven’t been so weird.
I guess,
after having done this sort of work
for over 25 years
one is bound to have some stories to share.


Where does the weirdness come from?
Where does the gimmickry
and individualism come from???
I suppose I’ll never know for sure.


But you know,
the weird stories
make the special masses,
like the one I was part of Saturday,
all the more worth it.


One little girl,
who is a member of the children’s choir,
was there as her parent’s
were getting married.
I’m glad I could be there
and be a part of it.
No weirdness.
Just holy people
exchanging holy vows
in a holy place.
Eucharist.
Couples being Eucharist to each other.
Parents being Eucharist to their children.


And you know,
the older I get
the more I appreciate
what marriage is.


And the older I get,
the more I just plain appreciate
The Eucharist.

The Cherubs, The Dancers, The Children, The Mariachi, and Summer Camp

I have been so busy lately.
I know I haven’t finished
writing all of The Road to Juquila blog entries.
I still have some thoughts about that trip:
about holy water;
about Our Lady’s mantle;
the story of Juquila.
And I promise to post all of that
as soon as possible.

But I really have been so-o-o busy.

February saw me working like a mad woman
on a proposal of sorts.
I don’t want to write to much about that here.
I only mean to say
that I did a lot writing
and a lot of soul searching.
Whether or not the grant money will arrive
is really only the half of it.
I learned so much from the process.
I needed to write
a personal mission statement
and vision statement.
One can learn a lot about self
in just such a process.
It was a time consuming process,
a draining process.
But mostly,
it was a selving process.

I continue to work at COMPAS
(Center of Music and Performing Arts Southwest).
To tell the truth,
I am finding that I love this job more and more.
I had two new piano students yesterday.
I think this puts me at 21 piano students now.
To tell the truth,
I’ve lost count!
And that just confirms for me
what I truly believe the Holy Spirit is calling me to.

You see,
I’ve been working in the music ministry
for well over 20 years. . . .about 28 years.
And I’ve led adult choirs,
children’s choirs, women’s choir.
I’ve worked with flutists, guitarists,
other organists and pianists.
I’ve worked with cellists, violinists,
bag pipers and trumpet players.
I’ve worked with cantors and soloists.
I’ve coordinated and collaborated
with various Mariachi groups.

But, somehow,
I feel this push,
this nudge.
It’s not just about planning and preparing
the music for liturgy anymore.
Oh, I love that
and will continue to do that forever, I do believe.
But I find I’m being called
to do more than that.

I find that I am being called
to create the musician today
that will become
the pastoral musician tomorrow.

One of my piano students
is a member of St. Gabriel’s children choir,
another child from the choir
is a voice student.

Two of my piano students,
sisters,
attend the evening mass
and often ask me about the songs from last Sunday,
what chords I used,
who cantored the psalm, etc.

Another of my piano students,
a gentleman
(whose daughter is also my student)
states that the only reason he wants to learn
is so that he can one day
lead the music at church.

One of my piano students
is a guitarist that works with me
in the music ministry at St. Gabriel’s.

The youth mariachi at COMPAS
is taught by Mr. Newhouse.
I often go downstairs
and just spend time with these wonderful young people.
I’ve sang with them a couple of times,
just for fun.
These young musicians
are currently working on a mass setting.
Mr. Newhouse and I
are presently visioning
how we can bring these young musicians
to church,
a mass where youth mariachi are the musicians
and the children’s choir
lead the singing.
It’s still all just an idea.
But at least we are planning and discussing
and putting it out there!

But even more,
a few members of the choir at St. Gabriel
are starting to ask me questions
about a lot more than the songs for liturgy.
A few of them
asked me for a keyboard chord chart.
Others are asking me,
not only how to play or sing a scale,
but how to create and form it,
about how to find the chords
that go with the scale.
When I explained the circle of fifths,
a light bulb went on
for one of the guitarists.

Yes,
I truly feel called,
to not only plan and prepare the music for worship,
but to also help create the musician
that will lead that music tomorrow.
And to create the opportunity,
especially for young people,
to lead the music themselves
every once in a while.

This is not at all to say
that I feel any less called
to a good old fashioned
pastoral music ministry.
On the contrary,
I vision much for St. Gabriel parish.

The children’s choir is doing fine,
though I still believe
that she could be twice the size
that she currently is.
Honestly,
I think 45 members
is optimum for a children’s choir,
for a variety of reasons,
which I won’t detail here.
But my point is,
while the children’s choir is holding its own,
there is much room for growth.

I am also increasingly aware
that there needs to be
a youth/teen music ministry in place.
I know the pastor has been visioning
and working on this,
but, I too, begin to see the future.
There must be place
for the children to grow into with their music
after they leave the children’s choir.
And I am increasingly aware
that this youth/teen music ministry
must be something that reflects teen culture,
not just the same old church stuff.

I also being to see
where a Cherub Choir needs to form,
a place where children ages 3-6
can begin their life of music ministry.
I haven’t mentioned this to the pastor yet,
but I’d like to flesh this idea out a bit
and perhaps start just such a program
by Sept. 2010.

And I have this idea,
an idea that has been with me
for many, many years,
long before coming to St. Gabriel,
about holding
a children’s music ministry summer camp.
I have been VERY impressed
by the Vacation Bible School at St. Gabriel.
And I begin to realize
that I am walking on the holy ground
where this music summer camp
may be able to take life.

I envision this being
time dedicated to a specific musical element,
the psalms, for example.
Or perhaps mass settings.

I envision this to include much more
than just the hum drum vocal exercises,
but to include
how music can be found all around us:
in the siren of the fire engine,
in the meow of a cat,
in the doorbell.

I envision this music summer camp
closing with a concert,
featuring new music learned.
But also closing with a challenge for these children:
What are you going to do
with the knowledge gained?
How are you going to make music better
for your church?
I envision not only teaching music,
but teaching that what we have received as a gift
we must give as a gift.

And then there is the parish dance troupe.
Yes,
I said dance troupe.
St. Gabriel has a Mexican Folkloric Ballet.
A wonderful group of young people
who make it their mission
to learn and preserve this wonderful art.
A number of churches in southwest Detroit
have dance groups,
but none of them,
to my knowledge,
are incorporating these talented youth
into liturgical celebrations.

Now,
I know the liturgical police
will probably place me under arrest
for even suggesting this.
So be it.
But I really would LOVE to see
these kids dance. . .
While we sing the Gloria. . .
While we sing Santo, Santo, Santo. . . .
Oh, what beautiful movements of praise
can be made!

. . . .and what if. . . .
What if. . .
What if the youth mariachi from COMPAS
served as musicians
and what if the children’s choir leads the singing. . .
And what if the folkloric ballet dances. . .
Wow!!!!

Oh, yes!
I am definitely being called,
being pushed and pulled
into something more. . . .

The Cherubs,
The Dancers,
The Children,
The Mariachi,
and Summer Camp. . .
If I could just get all of this stuff out of my head
and into reality. . . .

I realize that a lot of what I suggest here
will require funding,
which probably doesn’t exist right now.
But I’m game for looking for the money.
Writing this all out
on to electronic parchment
at least puts the ideas out there.
Goals and objectives can be written later.
Volunteers can be sought when the time comes.
For right now,
it’s just getting the ideas out of Rubi’s Head.
Once in better shape,
we (yes, I said “we”)
can look for funding.

The Cherubs,
The Dancers,
The Children,
The Mariachi,
and Summer Camp. . .

. . .yeah,
I’ve gone mad.
That will be my excuse
when the liturgical police
come to place me under arrest. . . .

Mananitas for Our Lady of Guadalupe

Yes. . .I was one of those crazy people
that get up in the wee hours of the morning
to go to church to "wake " Our Lady of Guadalupe on Her feastday.
Here are some photos I took this morning.
Pictures include Mariachi, Band,
and choir and singers from the parish.
A few pics of people
who participated in the "open mic" as well,
including a very young child.
Sorry.
No photos of children's choir.
I can't accompany
and take pictures at the same time!
Pictures taken at the mananitas this morning
at Detroit's St. Gabriel parish.
And sorry not to spend too much time cleaning photos up.
I just wanted to get them up today!
Happy December 12th!

Fiddlin' Around

Last weekend I went to the Irish Festival
here in Wyandotte,
the city where I live.

Anyone who knows me very well,
knows that I just love ethnic festivals
and art fairs and what not.

I love all things creative and artistic,
even when not of the genre I prefer.

I mean,
I love a good Mariachi.
But still, I attended the Irish festival.

So, what’s my point?
At this Irish Festival
I had a most wonderful time.
A wonderful and talented group
of young musicians performed, and,
well, what can I say but that they were just awesome!

Being a musician,
I can appreciate the quality of their musicianship.. .
. . taking cues from each other,
acknowledging each other,
assisting each other.

And their preparedness and confidence. . .
. . what a gift!
And they just seemed to be having
one good time!
To top it all off,
they were all teenagers!

Now, why would I blog about this
in a liturgy blog?
As always,
I try to make the connection
between liturgy and life.
I mean,
sometimes we go to church
and listen and pray and sing,
but make no real connection
with what goes on
in the church building on Sunday
and what goes on in everyday life.

The point is,
we need to celebrate the gifts God has given to us.
And we need to expand them
and share them.
And we need to really appreciate
the gifts that others bring,
even when we prefer another genre of gift.
And quite often
that gift is not a part of the Liturgy of Sunday,
indeed,
not even a part of the ecclesial structure at all,
but a part of the Liturgy of Life.

Laos Ergon - remember that?
The work of the people.
In the Liturgy of Life
we are constantly sharing the gift,
expanding the gift,
receiving the gift,
accepting the gift,
giving the gift.
Sadly,
unless it’s connected to the institutional church,
many just plain don’t recognize the giftedness of others.

These young people celebrate,
share, and are obviously
constantly expanding their gift.

Their parents recognized the gift,
and did what they could,
are doing what they can,
to bring out the gift.

Their teachers recognized the gift,
and did what they could to make the gift more.

And, together,
the community around these young people
are bringing this gift to others. . .
. . .which is how I came upon them
at the Irish festival.

The thing is,
when you celebrate the gifts
that our Good and Gracious God has given you,
well,
that plain and simply is
a song of praise to the Master Designer.

Enough of Rubi’s Ramblings.
Here they are
in a video I took in Wyandotte, MI.
Don’t forget to visit them at their website:
FiddlersRestrung.com

A Letter to St. Peter

March 4, 2008

Dear St. Peter,

I just read an article that made me cry about a parish in Minnesota. . . . Rules and Regulations. . Rules and Regulations. . . I know we need them to keep order. But sometimes the rules just get in the way.

I have a lot of questions I’d like to ask you. I just don’t know. I just don’t understand all of these rules and regulations and what they have to do with Life Eternal. Again, I know we need the rules to keep things running smoothly. But, well, it’s just that lately the rules create more darkness than light.

I mean, we just heard the story of the Man Born Blind at mass this past weekend. Yet, so many fail to be able to see. Please, St. Peter, answer my questions. I’d really like a clearer vision of what Diosito wants this Church of ours to look like for our day.

If David danced before the Lord
why isn’t o.k. for the faithful to do so today?

If Judith played her tambourine,
wouldn’t tambourines at worship
make liturgy more scripturally sound?

If a woman proclaims the Gospel at mass on Sunday
does that mean The Word is uttered without effect?

If the Paschal Candle
is placed 12 inches too far to the left
does that, somehow,
make the Holy Fire
of the Easter Vigil less sacred?

If some can’t even see
the metaphor in the previous question
without my pointing it out for them,
How can they possibly hope
to proclaim The Word,
which is so full of metaphors and creative imagery,
to today’s world?

If someone says,
"The Lord be with you,"
and I respond, "and also with you,"
instead of, "and with your spirit,"
does that mean that the Lord,
will not be with that person
because of the phrase I respond with?

And why is the church
worried about translations right now anyway?
Don’t we really have
things of much greater importance to be focused on?

If the vestment for Advent
Is closer to the color blue than purple,
will the Liturgical Police arrest someone?
Who will they arrest?
The priest who wore it?
The Worship Commission who decided upon it?
The parish secretary who ordered it?
The owners of the liturgical supply house

whose catalogue advertised it?
The owners of the company in China who made it. . . .

. . .who probably aren’t even Catholic anyway?
What would the Liturgical Police
say about a blue zarape?

If a Catholic priest gets married
does this, somehow, erase the Sacrament of Ordination?
If so, then,
if a married Anglican priest becomes a Catholic priest,
shouldn’t this, then, erase his marriage??

St. Peter,
When will you tell you us more about your wife?
I’m certain she could give many
the inspiration needed to keep going right now.
Can you tell her that there are many of us
that would like for her to start her own blog?
Her site would get plenty of hits,
that’s for sure!

And Oh. . . St. Peter. . .
. . when what’s going on in the country
goes and gets all mixed up the teachings of Jesus. . .
St. Peter, tell me,
before I feed the hungry
do I really need to ask to see their Green Card first?
And please explain to me, Good St. Peter,
how we can break the bread at the Eucharistic Table,
And then tell some of God’s children
it’s o.k. for them to harvest the grapes,
but it’s not o.k. for them to drink the wine?

And when Leonardo Boff was silenced,
didn’t anyone realize
that this would only make us hungrier for his words?

And Good St. Peter,
Please tell me the truth.
Wasn’t it a woman who first said these words,
"This is my Body.
This is my blood,"
When she embraced her newborn son

in the cave of Bethlehem?

And all this talk
Of what is or is not appropriate music for the liturgy.
Please tell me, San Pedro,
Is there a Mariachi Band in Heaven?
You see,
I just can’t imagine walking in through those pearly gates
Without the trumpet making music, "El Son de la Negra."

Quite frankly, it’s not The Kingdom without Mariachi.
If a Mariachi Band isn’t allowed,
then please don’t have them come for me
until you can straighten out the books on that one.

Please be sure to straighten out the rule about dancing, too.
Nothing celebrates the joy of life
that our Good and Gracious God has given us
like a really good Cumbia.

I’ll await your response on the rest of my questions.
In the meantime,
I’ll try to work them out from this earthly plain.

Say a hello to my dad for me.
You know, he was named after you.
I hope this isn’t asking too much,
But when it is time for me to Come Home,
I would prefer it if he was the San Pedro to open up the gates.
Actually, he’ll be able to do a lot of the grunt work for you.
I’m sure he’s already got a Mariachi band all picked out.

Oh, and say hello to Lupita for me, too.
I’m sure She couldn’t imagine Dec. 12th
without a really good Mariachi band
and really good Matachin dancers either.

I’m sure you have a lot of important work to do,
Being one of the major santos and all.
So I’ll close here.
Thank you for all that you do for us.
Estamos muy agradecidos.

Tu hermana en la lucha,
Rubi.

© 2008, Rubi Martinez-Bernat.
All Rights Reserved.

Second Letter to St. Peter

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Video:
Detroit Area Mariachi

Performing The Well Loved Celestial Song:
El Son De La Negra

The Latino Vote and Practical Pastoral Lessons

I am so tired of all the email I’d been receiving.
You know, the ones telling me how to vote.
I should vote for this one because as a Catholic
I should vote pro-life.
I should vote for this other because
as a Christian there really is no other choice.
As a woman, I should vote for this one.
As a minority, I should vote for the other one.

I wonder if it ever occurred to any of those folks
that I might just happen to be an informed voter?

And then I see this Youtube video.
I smiled
I laughed.
I cried.
And then I watched it again.
And again. . .
. . .and then I began to analyze this video. . .
. . .this wonderful, artistic grassroots publication.

Now, don’t read this all wrong.
What I am about to write
here in this blog
IS NOT a personal endorsement
for any one candidate or political party.

Rather, it’s an analysis of how something so simple,
something so cost efficient,
can rise from the grassroots community to make a difference.
And I’ll venture to say,
It will make or break this campaign.

I never thought I would write about politics
in my liturgy blog.
But as seems to be the case when I write,
I’ll connect the dots for you.
Just please bear with me.
There are a few practical pastoral lessons to be learned here.

Again,
This is NOT a political endorsement
of any candidate or party,
But an analysis of a grassroots cultural contribution.

I heard on Good Morning America this morning
That Hillary raised 35 million dollars
for her campaign this month.
Obama did 50 million dollars

Yet, what one media company did for the latter,
I am sure,
Will probably be worth more,
Will do more than what those millions of dollars will do.

You see,
these grassroots media folk cut to the chase.

Not one candidate in either political party
was really making a big dent in the Latino vote.
We are not invisible.
And we are not optional.
Although many haven’t realized it yet,
a lot of us are legal registered voters.

What these political campaigns have failed to realize
(or at least, failed to act upon)
is how to capture that Latino vote.

The Latino vote will not be harnessed in debates,
nor by filling auditoriums.
Oh, these are important.
But only if theses moments are evocative, emotive.

And the Latinos will not jump on board
because of celebrity endorsements or TV commercials.

But add a Mariachi,
And you’ve got our attention.

There’s just something about a mariachi band. .
. . . I’ve said it before. . .
I think it’s something in my DNA. . .
That trumpet just starts and I am in the moment. . .

Yes, this media company
did the Obama campaign a huge favor.

But, it’s not as simple as all that. . .
. . . there is creative genius in this video
and detail that you’ll miss
if you don’t pay attention.
Just blink and you’ll miss it.

The video starts off with a woman
Not just any woman.
She’s a Mexican Violin Playin’ Mariachi Latina.
The Mexican woman is one of the lowest paid workers
in the United States,
if not the lowest paid.
How’s that for starting off a video???

When the singer begins,
He tells you it’s a “corrido.”
A corrido is a song that tells story.
If you didn’t know the song was going to be a “corrido”
You do now because the singer just sang it and told you so.
So, you pay attention from the start
Because it is a corrido
And you want to hear the story.

So, with the Woman Violinist
and the word “corrido”
This video did in 12 seconds
what one year of campaigning and millions of dollars spent
have been unable to do. .
. . . capture the Latino audience attention. . .
. . .at least, hold their interest
to listen to what is about to be said.

This video isn’t buying anything with money.
It isn’t renting an auditorium.
It isn’t buying TV ad time.
It isn’t hosting a debate
(except for the electronic social network debates).
Youtube is letting it be played all over the world. . .
. . For FREE.

What it is doing is harnessing the grassroots Latino vote.
And the video is going to those places
where the grassroots folk are employed. .
. . .those places we go to every day. . .

The video shows images of workers. . .
. . .Construction workers, Restaurant workers,
Hair Stylists, Landscaping, the Auto Mechanic. . .

. . .The Mariachi band is strolling down the street.. .
. . .in front of a cell phone store,
a hair salon. . . .we see the lady at the laundromat.

We’ve probably even forwarded this video
to some of those very places.

This definitely hit home
to the grassroots working class Latino folks.

And it’s using language that makes a difference.
Now, I’m not talking Spanish / English here.

Words like “lucha.”
That’s a Spanish Power Word.
Literally, it means “struggle.”
Yet, it evokes all sorts of emotions and memories.
It is the “lucha” that forces us to make priorities.
It is the “lucha” that builds character.
It is the “lucha” the forces us, teaches us how to survive.
The video shows a man of color
and speaks of the fact this his struggle is our struggle.
No amount of money in any campaign
Can buy what those cleverly sung words evoke.

And some cleverly used
political buzzwords are used in this video:
Familia – Family
Unidos - United
Humilde – Humble
Plan de Salud – Health care plan.

And when the word “vision” is used,
We see images of people together,
Various races, united and smiling with their candidate.

And the greatest Power Word of all: VIVA
You can’t give the shout out “viva" unless it’s real,
Unless you mean it.
And yet, VIVA demands a response. . . .

. . If you can’t or won’t give your assent
with a shout back of “viva”
it forces you to think. . .
. . .forces you to articulate for yourself
where and to what you can say “Viva” to.

This grassroots effort is phenomenal.
If the Democratic party were smart,
They would hire this media company
To create an add for their party’s candidate,
Who ever that may be in the end.
If they Republicans were smart,
They would beat the Dems to it.

So. . .what are the pastoral lessons
to be learned from all of this?

1.
Remember the value women add to your congregation.
Parish secretaries, catechists. . . the committee work. . .
. . .the grunt work. . .the kitchens. . . the fundraisers.
Women give birth in more ways than one.
Remember the women.
Honor them.
Treasure them.

2.
Remember that the Power isn’t always in the pocketbook.
The parishioner with the biggest checkbook
may not be your congregation’s greatest treasure.
Find the pearl.
Find the diamond.
These will lead you to other such treasures.
Appreciate them all.
Celebrate them all.

3.
Think creatively,
Especially now that times are hard in this country.
Nothing sparks creativity like the “lucha.”
Use this to your advantage.

4.
Know your congregation.
Speak their language.
Even if this means you must learn a few new words every now and again.
Be aware that language doesn’t necessarily equal linguistics.

5.
Use the power of Social Networking sites such as Youtube.
Video tape homilies.
Video tape missions,
Bible study, reflections.
And please video tape your youth group.
That’s a treasure beyond measure.
Post it all to Youtube.
And then post it to your parish website and/or blog.
You never know how much you’ll benefit.
For the truth is,
for better or for worse,
We are living in an age
that requires us to use Electronic Evangelization,
as well as traditional methods.
It’s free and it’s easy.

6.
Use the shout out “Viva” where applicable.
It demands a response.
It will bring about that
“. . full, conscious, active participation”
called for in the Constitution on the Sacred Liturgy.

7.
And finally,
And perhaps, most importantly,
don’t forget to hire a Mariachi Band.
It’s well worth the expense.
And it will be pay untold dividends.

¡Viva Cristo Rey!
¡Viva La Virgen de Guadalupe!

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Video with Spanish Text



Video with English Text